Jezza for Jihad

As I wrote in the aftermath of last year’s general election, the real story was not the right-wing political fracture but the emergence of sectarian voting:

“The realpolitik of the Muslim block vote was not wasted on Jeremy Corbyn, who not only won his Islington seat on a pro-Palestine ticket, but must have been kicking himself that his particular brand of terrorist sympathy and tolerance for antisemitism failed to meet so receptive an audience back in 2019.

Merely crunching the numbers does not tell the whole story. Those who put ‘Gaza’ at the forefront of their campaign won seats in Blackburn, Dewsbury & Batley, Birmingham Perry Barr, Leicester South (as well as Islington). But the Muslim vote was also highly influential, almost unseating Wes Streeting in Ilford North and Jess Phillips in Birmingham Yardley, and bizarrely returning Iain Duncan Smith to his Chingford & Woodford Green constituency after a former candidate split the Labour vote.

While the overall tally was short of the 20 seats Labour were predicted to lose over the Israel-Palestine conflict, Starmer will be gravely concerned by the exodus of Muslim voters. Polling just ahead of the election suggested their support for Labour would be down around 20%, but in constituencies where the Muslim population approaches 40% this turned out to be a whopping 33.9 percentage points.

With the obvious anger bubbling beneath the surface, the indications are that the Muslim vote is preparing to go it alone.”

While 2029 may still be a long way off, it’s clear that certain elements within the Muslim community want to test the water sooner rather than later; ditching their parasitic dependence on the Labour Party, and hiding their agenda within plain sight.

Still, the launch could have been better. Zarah (brain the size of a) Sultana, the MP for Coventry South, appeared to jump the gun slightly when she announced that, as ‘the government is an active participant in genocide’, she would be co-leading a new party along with Jeremy Corbyn:

Not for the first time it seems, Corbyn was caught with his dick in his hand (or rather, his Diane in his bed), and it took him 18 hours to confirm he was on-board. Finally corroborating the story, Corbyn was obviously desirous of downplaying the role of Sultana, and also failed to verify his position as leader. Nonetheless, it is evident that Sultana’s new party is a goer:

Politics famously makes strange bedfellows, and while Sultana and Corbyn might look like an odd couple, their disparate electoral appeal may just have legs. Sultana’s “We are all Palestine Action” schtick more than makes up for her lack of intellect, while Corbyn’s name recognition and ‘I’ve never met a terrorist I couldn’t sympathise with’ useful idiocy will undoubtedly harness the support of champagne socialists, all too willing to be on the wrong side of history.

It’s early doors of course, but support thus far has been patchy at best. Corbyn does have an Independent Alliance with four other ‘pro-Gaza’ MPs in the House of Commons (I.A. for short, although in hindsight, A.I. – anti-Israel might have been punchier). However, the hard-left group Momentum – established to push Corbynite policies – failed to offer its endorsement:

“Zarah Sultana has announced the founding of a new Left-wing party. This is obviously a painful moment for us as socialists in the Labour Party, and Zarah will be a major loss. But we respectfully disagree with Zarah’s position. This is a complex question of strategy on which good socialists can reasonably disagree. We laid out some arguments as to why socialists should stay in Labour a few months ago.”

Meanwhile, despite a lot of cooing and sympathy from Labour MPs, stalwart Corbyn allies like John McDonnell, Diane Abbott and Clive Lewis have all confirmed they will not be joining the new party.

This leaves Jezza somewhat at a loss. Bereft of the usual hodgepodge of malcontents, he may need to rely on some heavy-hitters to fluff up his shadow cabinet. Regrettably with Robert Mugabe, Idi Amin and Gerry Adams unavailable, that means Corbyn needs to get a bit more creative. Rumours are that he is in discussion with Ayatollah Khamenei – Minister for Women and Equalities, keen to relocate, as well as Salman Abedi (Home Secretary) and Anjem Choudary (Foreign Secretary), both of whom are willing to ‘work from home’.

As is customary for fledgling political parties, the policy priorities are somewhat hazy at present. Naturally, Free Palestine, death to Jews and a bumper increase to Jihad Seekers’ Allowance are givens, but Corbyn is also partial to chicks with dicks and Gays for Allah, so it’s unclear exactly how that will dovetail.

The most obvious thing clearly missing from the party however, is a name. Might I suggest the Palestine Action Party (PAP), Corbynista Anti-Zionist Collective (CAC) or Corbyn’s Radical Anti-Zionist Posse (CRAP). But seriously, I hope he just keeps it simple and registers ‘Jezza for Jihad’ with the Electoral Commission as soon as possible.

Frank Haviland is the Editor of The New Conservative, and the author of Banalysis: The Lie Destroying the West.

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